Keep Your Power

After waking up, I leap out of bed, almost breaking my neck in the process. I frantically rush to turn on my cellphone to check for messages. Panic sets in as there are no messages after having my phone on for twenty-five seconds. Suddenly, relief washes over me as I hear a beep notifying me that two of the fifteen girls replied to my three paragraph SMS I sent the evening before. One of the girls seems like a promising prospect as we have been texting back-n-forth for over two months now. Even though my hands have become mangled claws from constantly calling, texting, emailing and reaching out to girls in every way possible, it will all be worth it if I can just add one more notch to my belt this week!

Since my life is entirely devoted to pursuing women and getting numbers, naturally I put on some clothes and head straight to the mall to sarge. On the way there, I see fifty hot girls across the street so I sprint through traffic without hesitation to tell each one how beautiful she is, getting honked at by drivers and barely escaping death (not to do so would make me an EXCUSER!)

After spending eight hours straight walking in circles around the mall regurgitating canned routines to girls, security kicks me out so they can lock-up. I’ve approached so many women today that I broke my old record — I can do a thousand now. Most of the girls told me they have boyfriends, others make up strange excuses and walk away, a few laugh, a few run; However, I manage to get heaps of numbers — looks like it’s going to be another busy night of calling and texting girls!

Sounds silly, huh? The funniest part is that at one time that was my life…

Things finally changed for me when I stood back and saw that lifestyle for how hilariously pathetic it was. Chasing women all day is not all it’s cracked up to be, no matter how many approaches are done, no matter how many numbers/dates/lays are got. Being able to say “I worked hard to get to where I am” is not a virtue, it’s just poor time-management.

There are all those stories out there about guys got to where they are The Hard Way™ after spending years busting their backs trying to shape their lives around their women, until one day they finally either got so frustrated and exhausted with the old way that they sought out a new, easier way of being. Suddenly those guys discovered that by doing less, they got more.

Do you really want to do things The Hard Way™ like I did? Or are you ready for things to be effortless?

The good news is that you don’t have to go down that road I did (unless you want to give up any semblance of meaningful lifestyle that you might already have). It can all be avoided by asking yourself this one question: What really makes me happy?

Not surprisingly, for me the answer had nothing to do with getting a hundred phone numbers a day or dating a dozen women at once. In fact, the answer was far off, completely unrelated — it’s no wonder it took so long for me to find! (Actually, it was more like finding it again.)

For me the answer was replacing all that time I spent pursuing women with a meaningful lifestyle. It was getting back to going out to have a good time, instead of going out to pickup girls. It was rediscovering all my passions in life I’d left behind. It was pursuing the dreams in life that I knew would make all the difference.

The irony of it all is that aside from removing the stress and frustration that comes with making pursuing women a full-time job, living life for myself radically changed everything because women now pursued me. I’d finally given them the opportunity they wanted to chase after me! It has been a wild ride ever since, but that’s another story…

What really makes YOU happy?

Popularity: 19% [?]

There is a lot eBay we can learn from eBay about social dynamics:

“When perfect strangers, who are thousands of miles apart, trust each other to conduct transactions, it’s a compelling testimonial to the power of everyone in the eBay Community. At the core of this power is the strength of eBay’s Community Values, which are built on the bedrock that ‘People are basically good.’”

source: http://pages.ebay.com/community/chatter/2004december/poaou.html

Sure, there are scumbags out there, but generally when I am meeting new people, it’s extremely rare that I ever meet someone who will tell me to “fuck off” or disrespect me for no reason whatsoever. Yet I hear guys say things like, “I barely said anything, and she threw her drink in my face!”

Those things almost always happen for a reason. There are rare exceptions when someone is truly in the wrong place at the wrong time when someone else with a bad attitude decides to take out their aggression on the next person they see. Yes, that happens sometimes, but those experiences don’t have to clutter our judgement and install negative assumptions in our minds.

Many guys who are out learning to socialize and develop confidence are carrying around the baggage from those past experiences and projecting those negative beliefs onto the people they meet, and like a self-fulfilling prophecy everything they assume becomes true because they are scared and bitter.

Ask yourself the following questions:

• When another man approaches the group of girls you’re talking to, do you immediately assume he’s there to steal your women, OR do you assume he is out to have a good time and socialize?

• When the waitress brings you your bill and you see a $100 charge for something you didn’t order, do you assume she’s trying to rip you off, OR do you assume she just made an honest mistake that she will gladly fix?

• When your friends don’t return your phone call, do you assume they don’t respect you, OR do you respect that they would love to hang out with you but they’ve been busier than usual and haven’t been able to return calls.

• When you make plans to go out on a Friday night, do you assume it’ll be another night of getting shot down and rejected by nasty, mean people, OR do you assume everyone will be friendly and easy to talk to, love your personality, and women will approach YOU wanting to get to know you?

When I noticed a pattern in my life of habitually being wrong about my negative assumptions, I began to replace them with positive assumptions, and sure enough my assumptions are almost always right. After all this, I’ve truly come to believe that people are generally good.

I propose that rather than assuming the worst of people, justifying rejection and safely sitting at home avoiding people for fear of that one bad experience that left a bitter taste, try taking the risk of assuming the best. Even if your new positive assumptions are wrong once in a while, when you begin living a life without fear and allow yourself to enjoy people and making new friends, the payoff you’ll gain is much more valuable.

Popularity: 17% [?]

My best friend is a guy who is always saying the most brilliantly clever and funny lines. A while back he said something that stopped me dead in my tracks and I was paralyzed with LAUGHTER…

As I was talking to him, I said, “I was just wondering…” Before I could even ask my question, he interrupted me with, “Yeah, it’s huge.” Next thing I know I was laughing so hard that I couldn’t even remember the question.

It dawned on me that what he said would be great to use when speaking with a woman.

Women are always asking questions. Often they are interpreted as “shit tests”, which is something that a woman says/does where what she says is completely irrelevant, rather the way the man REACTS to it is important.

In light of this always happening when interacting with women, wouldn’t it be great if there was a way to charm her before she could even ask the question? If you made her giggle so much that she couldn’t even ask the question and keep a straight face? Can you imagine the attraction this would create if you had already passed her shit-test before she even asked it?

Women are often asking these CHALLENGING questions because they are ATTRACTED to the man. When they’re asking the man these questions, it’s often an attempt to throw themselves out of their aroused state by having you argue with them, say something lame, or being predictable and boring.

Take these examples:

Her: “I was just wondering…”

You: “Yeah, it’s huge.”

Typically these challenges from women can be questions like “how many women have you slept with?” or “how many women are you seeing right now?” Most guys might answer logically or in a predictable way, but women HATE that. They are asking you these questions to throw themselves OUT OF STATE.

Here’s another example:

Her: “Let me ask you something…”

You: “The answer is no, you’re not getting into my pants tonight.”

Women are dreaming of finding men who have confidence, humour, and unpredictability. You will have just conveyed that all in a few words if you do this with the right timing!

Give it a try. I’ve tested using this countless times since I was lucky enough to hear it, and it works amazingly!

Popularity: 15% [?]